Friday, January 2, 2015

"Let Me 'Splain"

"No. There is too much. Let me sum up."

The week has been a good one. It started on the 28th, with a decision. A decision to let go of the life I'd been living, and to build a new one - starting with a massive (albeit slow) renovation of my physical health. 

I've tried new recipes, I've exercised, trying new equipment, and I've seen the scale begin a downward trek. Kind of like climbing a mountain, but backwards. The effort is all going downhill! I'm being rather public and open about it all because I think it's what I need. 

So overall, a great week. A few wobbles perhaps, but in the bigger picture, they are insignificant because I haven't been derailed by them. 

Much progress has been made in the "I hate my body" war. I no longer hate it. I don't quite love it either, but a steadily growing appreciation for it is probably accurate. 

Something interesting to note is that for someone on a 'diet', I seem to be thinking about food constantly. It's a bit draining. Like just now, when I was trying to find an easy alternative to the pizza my family are asking for, because I feel like I'm going so well, I don't want to lose momentum and will pizza push me back into 'eat for comfort' mode?

Answer by the way, is emphatically NO. One slice of pizza, eaten with a large salad and a glass of water, will not ruin my whole week. Why? Because I won't allow it to. I don't want to ban any food (except perhaps Coke; that's quite possibly a permanent thing) - because I love all kinds of food. I need to learn how to eat food and truly enjoy it, in MODERATION.

So I'm going to eat that one slice of pizza, and I will eat it slowly, savoring every cheesy bite. 

I am feeling very tired, as I slowly adapt to this new 'normal'. Come 9:30, I am done.

Something else that I've noticed is that I am more confident with putting my needs first, instead of allowing everything/everyone else push me to the bottom of the list. Which means that exercise is actually happening, because I'm making it happen. The kids aren't yet completely on board, but I'm happy they are finally seeing their mother care for her physical needs. 

XO, Sarah




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